Having a brain that still believes it's 21 has it's 'downfalls' when it's controlling the body of a 43 year old. Or not controlling. as the case was last night.

I'd got big plans for tonight (made in haste last night :D)

No cycling, as I'd be over the limit!! (Even now!)

10:30 am, I'm sooo excited, I have just found on the internet..(this is bizarre, geeky and a tad worrying!!!) I have just found, and ordered my very own.........tricycle pendant!! It's so funny :D

14:30 Children know how to hurt :( My daughter didn't want to go to 'Easy Tigers' wi me today, because I couldn't chase after her, like Daddy did. I took my wee boy and a mate instead and they had great fun.

16:00 I was a wuss and cycled about 25 yards and back, just so I could say I'd been for a ride. But I don't feel safe to be honest. I can't wait till school starts, and Gretel becomes part of my routine again.

18:30 I'm having a bit of a party night in a bit. So must go and put some slap on my face :) xx

Wow!! This is a deep and heavy one, it's kinda snuck up on me, and wam bam stripped me to the bare bones. It's my son's 7th b'day today, and I must admit the past 3 years have been difficult, because I've always made a big point of searching out a male 'friend' for us all to spend the day with. This invariably has led to disappointment on my side.

This year was gonna be different, I haven't searched anyone out. I'd rather spend my day just thinking what would make my wee boy happy, not walking a tightrope, trying to appease a man's feelings. Whilst my son gets his 2nd lot of b'day pressies, with his Dad. I can be all self indulgent and get engrossed in my writing, not once have I been tempted to go all melancholic. Whatever it was that made me the strong person, I now am, I'm just glad it happened, because I like being me.

Ooooooooh how exciting, It's getting dark out :D, I best use my new bike lights, just to be on the safe side you must understand ;)

(I bottled it :( It just got too dark, I feel a rite wuss now. )

I'm trapped in 1988, at the age of 21, and I'm massively excited now, because six of us are going to a singles night. I'm such a hypocrite, after reading the first paragraph. I know this ain't got too much to do with cycling, but I just feel happy and in control, which I think does have a lot to do with cycling.

I do love folk :) .....sorry if I'm boring, but I don't think there's enough positivity in our lives, so I just try and make people feel happy.

Did you know?? (This is really tedious if you know me because I do say it a lot.) Research shows that if you talk to a positive person, it increases your mood by 9%, on the other hand if you speak with a negative person, it lowers your mood by 7%, I like folk to feel happy about talking to me so so I do try to be positive. I've just blown away my trade secret now!!!

This afternoon was spent catching up with paper work with Miriam who takes care of my health champions work and expenses, which in turn enables me to do Cycle For Health. Which I love doing.

Ooooh my contact cards came today, what am I like? It's not as egotistical as it sounds. I'm just being very practical, because my memory is crap, so it just makes my life easier. And in fact I cycled to the shops, I deliberately went when it was dark so I could use my new lights :)

Anyway, I was locking Gretel up, and this teenage manboy approached with two others, and held out his hand. A long conversation followed, and I am so chuffed that I had my contact cards. I hope he gets in touch, I think we might be able to help his Gran :)

Awwww had a long chat with Nigel who financially supports me being a 'health champion'. I wish I'd spoken to him sooner about my worries, because he was fantastic.

I'm missing Steve, and Dave for their positive talk.

My kids cycled 12 miles today, and they still ain't tired.

I've got my new lights, and a rather quaint white basket all fitted.

Yesterday, just went eeeeeeeammmmm!!!.............and I kind of missed it. What a waste ey? I just slept all day.

Today, I wasn't going to be like that, I was going to be a bit more pro active, because I like being pro active.

I had an appointment with Andy, my lovely physio. Who indeed has worked wonders on my 'achilles tendonitus' .Please contact me, on cardouglas10@hotmail.com, if you want his details. What a positive guy he is, I love spending time there even though it's a bit sore. 'No pain no gain' as the saying goes.

Went to the library for a bit of constitutional.

I did cycle to the physio and library, and coop. But it's just normal behaviour now. I do it without thinking. Once I've got over this chest thing, which I can still feel rutling, in the morning, I will move the goal posts and try and go further.

My big bruv is having my children to sleep o'er tonight, and taking them on a mammoth bike ride tomorrow. I was really proud, because they were excited about it, and surprisingly they are well equipped in cycling equipment and knowledge.

I'm also thinking.......about coming off my anti convulsants. I ain't had a fit for two and a half years. And well I feel good. I'll talk about it with my gp :)

I wish I'd planned s'thing for tonight :(

Had a nice lay in this morning, which didn't do my chest any good, I have to say. I cycled with my wee boy to the library for this week's DVDs for the kids, leaving my girl home alone. Which is a scarey thing for me to do, even though she is 11 in 2 weeks, and to be honest, she's got an old head on her shoulders, perhaps a little too old at times. She shocks even me sometimes.

But her extremely responsible nature comes from having a single mum who has a disability, and a younger bruv who's extremely popular.

It was fab at the library, because I bumped into another Mum, and began gathering support for what is the busiest time of year for me and the kids. Halloween, F* b'day, bonfire night, D* b'day culminating in a big party at the end where I'm picking the kids up from school in a fire engine. (Nowt like drawing attention, is there?)

Anyway this Mum raved about Gretel, saying how cool she looked. So I went to town, feeling all proud of myself. And bought Gretel, a new shopping basket, (box of wine size ;) ) a front and rear light and some of those wrap around lights :)

I'm happy. :)

Urrgh!!!!! I feel dreadful, I reckon I'm suffering from 'cabin fever'. I know I ain't got the full blown effects of a chest infection, because I am managing to lift my fingers to type. :) If my two mates hadn't have called this am, I might have had a very lonely day.

Awwww aren't folk really so nice, Julian Woodward a journalist from MAPA who's been asked to run a story on my inspirational cycling and how it helps folk has agreed to donate some money to my 'recumbent fund' in return for a photo donated by Pedal Ready. How devoted to enabling me to have control of my own mobility they must be. So thank you, it's exactly what I need. I just hope I'm not too dim to learn.

I missed not having the freedom, to go and see my mates at the school gates. I was just too poorly.

I've got to admit Cycle for Health today was a bit of an effort. But for personal reasons, I had to try. And I'm glad in a way I did, because I made at least one person really happy, just by noticing that she'd got her teeth fixed. She was really chuffed that someone had noticed, and that made the effort of going worthwhile.

I saw Simone who works for Pedal Ready, who I used to see on a regular basis at Endcliffe Park, and in fact, hovered in case I fell off the first time I went on Gretel, as Steve covered me at the other side.

I met Louise (also from Pedal Ready ), who was really positive and friendly, and very patient as I really wasn't up to much. But I'm glad I made the effort.

Awwww, there isn't any CFH next week, due to half term.

(I'm still walking round, like I've got one leg longer than the other!!!...or a big platform shoe on one foot). I must go to Decathalon, and buy some of those wrap around neony type lights. Hey, do you think I'll crouch in a lurid fashion and rub my thighs at them? I have heard they're very attractive?

Awww, I just had to add this bit, I was watching the Simpsons wi' my little boy. On seeing Marge Simpson get on her tandem, wi' her children I said: 'Is that how you think Mum is?' He said: 'No way!!! You are so happy and cool mum, and everyone knows it.' :)

5am Couldn't sleep, my chest is rustling. I have no auto immune system, so I'll need to phone the doctors and get some antibiotics, and try and nip it in the bud. Awwww I had such a funny day yesterday, as well.

1.30 Still waiting for any tabs to be delivered and I want to start them, so they start to kick in by tomorrow's Cycle For Health. Although my temperatures only reading at 37.5, which is fairly ok. I'm such a cool chick it's normally a steady 36.

I feel the opposite to how I felt yesterday, I've had no electricity. My friend bought me a flask round, unfortunately my pc, don't run on hot water..

And how come all these 'experts' say 'Ohh you don't wanna do that' I've just had a very opinionated welfare worker round who knew more about the legal system than solicitors who get paid £60 an hour!!

Aren't I horrid? I'll come back to this later, and hopefully I'll be a bit nicer.

I've got my tablets now, I was ne'r a believer in tablets of any kind and only take them if the effect of not taking medication is really harmful. Now you may think chest infection, bearable? But since I had my spleen removed, I just can't hack infections, I become so debilitated. And if my temperature gets high, then I have a 'seizure' which is potentially life threatening, but because I'm mindful, of this, it hasn't happened for two and a half years years. So I am happy now. And hey, I've just recalled, I bet this is why I've been panting like a fat lass!

I ain't been out on Gretel all day, I don't know if my legs are strong enough.

You see I still ramble even when I've nowt to talk about.

Looking forward to seeing folk at Cycle For Health, I've ordered my taxi.

I'm in such a good mood again. Strangely enough, it's because of my poorly foot, I'll explain, if I dare? The last thing I want is to hurt someone by saying this. But Andrew (physio) last night in order to take the stress from my heel, put in an air sole (I said air sole!!) Anyway I now feel like I've got one of those shoes on with the built up wedge!! (So it's taking a bit of getting used to.)

Tuesdays my Tesco bus day, it's so sad everyone, including myself, is so institutionalised, we sit in the same seats every week, know each other on first name basis. Today was 'class' - one old lady shouted, ''Ethal, how's your big pussy?" "Ooooh not so good, it's old age, she dribbles everywhere!!"

I can talk for England!!

I bumped into my school friend's Dad, who came to see me when I was in intensive care, and at my wedding. I've known the guy since I was 13 and I've bumped into him intermittently since my ex left.

I might bore everyone now, but I just think it's important to get the type of character I was, and have become again. Well, my friend was a similar personality, very sociable, extremely naughty, but never nasty. And her husband did the same as mine, he ran off with her best mate. (Leaving her with 3 children.)

Anyway getting back, this Dad was crying nearly, because he said I looked 10 years younger, and so confident. It gave him hope that things night improve for his daughter, so I left my moby number, I hope she calls.

I returned home on the Tesco bus, and as he pulled up, I struggled out of my seat carrying four bags and pulling a trolley. Anyway, I couldn't catch my trousers in time, and they fell down, exposing my ass, and knickers. I turned round and coolly said, hey it's because I've lost weight :)

I then had to dress my son up like the zombie of death, and take him to Beavers. I must get some lights, it was a bit scary. I witnessed an assault!!! (it's like Afghanistan) so I peddled as fast as I could round the corner, and called the police!

Thankfully someone's bringing my wee boy back, so I can take these wet clothes off, which I've had on since school!

I love mornings, it is good to be alive. I hate it when folk pity me, and soon put them right if I detect it. But that makes me sound tetchy about the disability issue, I assure you I am not at all. Folk who are reading this and know me, will categorically vouch that I am extremely laid back.

My calf, and achilles were hurting. So I booked an appointment for evening time.

I don't want to sound negative about the cycling, because it's opened so many doors for me. And it is easy to maintain doing it because I love the freedom it allows. But I am an insy bit worried about my 'chest' as well now :(

You know, I've mentioned before about 'Not panting much for a fat lass?' Well it is actually a big fib. The physical exertion of me getting my weight plus that of the trike to school does cause me to get a tad out of breath!!!! Anyway, I now feel like I've got water on my lungs, thing is I'm an insy bit concerned, because I can taste blood!! When I cough. I know it sounds scarey. But the feel good factor out ways any aches. Sorry to go on tonight, but this is in fact a story with a happy ending. At 4 we nipped for a healthy tea at the deli, because I knew I would be a while at the physio, and it is just across the road.

What a fantastic guy, my physio is, his name is Andrew Okwera (07901968549). As if he could get a quick medical history off me!!! (Poor guy) Anyway, his diagnosis was (hang on he wrote it down) 'Achilles Tendinopathy' .........the good news is, it's possibly not caused by cycling. It's more likely to be my new busier lifestyle!! He did some ultra sound treatment, a bit of bending and supplied an air heel. All at a discount price because we're friends now :) Ey, he's massively into mountain biking which is cool.

Oh, nearly forgot, I was just cycling to school, and this cyclist came up to me at the school gates. Shook my hand and said 'Hello, you must be Caroline? I'm Barry, from the 'Pedaller' magazine.' What a positive happy chappy.

At the school gates, a woman came up to me and said 'Hello Caroline' I work for the council, and I've just come out of a meeting with Nigel West, the area health champions co-ordinator, who in fact enables me to do Cycle for Health on a Thursday. Who's been singing your praises. It's like been a celebrity.

Hectic morning, getting bags packed for 'dads day, with a sleep over.' I'd booked a pc whizz to come and debug my kids computer.

I was so excited about the positive stuff that's been going on this week, it all went to my head, and I ordered my own contact cards, entitled '3 Wheels and Me'. Well I never remember the address of my blog, it's a brain damage thingy, I think. Anyway I paid homage to the CTC and Pedal Ready on the reverse side.

I made myself go out on Gretel, but hey, it's a pleasure really, because you can never be lonely if you have a 3 wheeler!

I'm just about to go in the bath, because the doctor with the nice bedside manner's paying me a visit ;) x

10.00 After a busy morning getting my two children off to school, the taxi picked me up to take me to the Head Injury Rehab Centre, where I have been involved in some research for two years, and how grateful I am sometimes that the folk there perhaps understand me a little more than most.

14.00 Set off to get my daughter, who'd got an appointment at the gp's, and the teacher and she forgot!!!! which meant I had to go up the school drive to get her. Fortunately, a new 'pusherupthehill' :) offered.

15.30 A mum was concerned that I wasn't there for my son, so he has had tea with a mate.

Hey, and do you know, I have this black pair of trousers that a couple of months ago I couldn't get on. And now? They fall down! (With a bit of help!!!) :D

What a fantastic day this was to be because I was going to be able to show off my cycling success. And what happens when different personalities work together with the one aim. And how that aim can change and unselfishly become all 'inclusive'

I arrived at Hillsborough to see about 20 bikes outside the lodge. Eeeek, I took a deep breath and entered the building. I was really chuffed when Steve introduced me to the group, it was great. Everyone wanted to speak, I should have been on the stage, I reckon, because I do seem to thrive on attention. Does it make me bad? Fortunately the three guys who got me into cycling have gorgeous kind personalities, ok and looks. And it doesn't matter now I've caught the bug, but I don't think I'd have been as successful had it have been three fat ugly women. Am I revealing too much, heck!! I can't help it, it's me.

I do hope I've been able to influence lots of 'Steves' from around the country. And maybe next time they see a mobility scooter, or a wheelchair, they will thing of the possibilities?

Please post comments, or email me, hey you could even stalk, I mean follow my blog?

If I met you today, then Hello, and I look forward to hearing from you soon.xxxxxxx

(Below: With the 'Steves')

9.00 Got 3 messages of support in the night and this morning from the CTC, about My Article, and about the blog! Plus, I had 150 visits to my blog in a day!!!....wow. I can't believe that folk are interested, in 'lil' old me.

But it's not about me, is it? In fact that was a bit conceited, my writing is about 'life' and 'folk', and cycling. And 'There's nowt so funny as folk' as the saying goes.

Cycled a bit of the way to school with my boy, because it was 'Bike It' day. And Howard the Bike Doctor from Pedal Ready was gonna be there. And if my boy arrived early, he'd get croissants, and breakfast at school. My daughter, on the other hand, hadn't been assertive, and had let someone else be bike monitor for the school. (They don't even ride their bike to school!!)

14.00. Set off, with a energetic thrust on my pedal. I think it's because I know I've done naff all today. And I needed to wake myself. But I had a right long chat wi' a mum, at the shops. And if I'm honest it was only so I could have a rest :) She said how she admired my effort, and how much stronger I looked. I can only put that down to growing confidence.

14.45 What a cheeky woman I am. I introduced myself to Howard 'the Bike Doctor' (I must say at this point, that just because he was a Dr, bedside manner, didn't come into it). Explained who I was, and Dave you're right, I am famous, he knew all about me!!!

I asked if he had time to look at Gretel, and her disc brake as she was on loan from the big CTC. And the poor guy, must have had at least 100 bikes to look at. And he explained it was his first time at doing the repairs at Totley. Anyway, he fixed Gretel in a jiffy, and she now glides as if on ice. (I'm full of it sometimes!!)

17.30 I set off to school (for parents evening,) with my kids for the 3rd time today. (Masochism?) - I must get some lights.

I've just forced the bike issue at school, because I usually wait at the bottom now, I wasn't sure if anyone knew of Gretel. I just wanted to name drop a bit :) So thank's for that everyone.

9.00 am Children off to school, with their 'blue' and 'red' things for the harvest festival. Why school has to make things difficult????? I mean I'm sure if I was hungry, I wouldn't care what colour, the food was wrapped in.

10.00 Tesco on the bus.

12.00 To my dear Mum's, I feel I've neglected her, because I was in London last Tuesday, and she really missed my visit. It was nice to see her face light up when I walked in.

14.45 Gretel is poorly again, well was. The disc brakes appear to be on on the rack. She's so difficult to ride, plus she squeaks constantly. I had wanted to cry. I alerted the school that I was stuck at home. I felt helpless, I had forgotten that feeling. In steps Richard my star cleaner :) ......It's fixed now, in time for me to take F* to Beavers later.

18.15 I love Gretel again, in other words I love my freedom. Hopefully I will be able to buy my own bike for Low Edges, you see there's no stopping me, once I find a mission!

9.00 am Really chuffed that I challenged some discrepancies in an article. And the author was a star, and took it on the chin.

11.00 am Heard I wasn't going to be able to take a low rider to do the Cycle For Health at Low Edges , despite everyone's efforts to enable me to continue. It just wasn't gonna happen.

15.00 Bad news at the school gates, too personal.

15.30 My cards got declined in the coop.

15.45 Awww bless my kids are soooo excited about this luxury hotel their dad is taking them to in New York for Christmas shopping. I had to be all enthused, as they showed me on the internet.

Thank goodness Gretel doesn't cost anything to run. :(

My first really negative entry, sorry folks. But I am human.

I feel empowered today, so thank you for that. You know who you are.

I have missed my kids, but my leg feels as if it's benefited from not having to cycle, or go anywhere today. I've just had a long soak in a Radox bath, massaged my calf with oil. And it feels marvellous, I feel marvellous :)

I feel as if I've neglected my children today, by not giving them too much attention. But saying that I made myself go out on Gretel, to take DVDs and stuff back. On returning, I pulled up a settee and slept on it, stirring to feed and grunt at my two kids.

I've just hobbled to the kitchen, my calf doesn't feel good.

Had a fairly slow day. I mean although cycling's doing wonders for my soul, it feels like it's totally knackering my body in! I hobble round permenantly, and unfortunately my right leg, which is my 'good' unaffected (by brain damage) side, is the leg that does all the work when walking and cycling and therefore is the side that's strained permanently. And it ain't easy to give it a day's rest, because I have to cycle everywhere!

Cycled to school at three, and it was great. I bumped into Jeff and Amanda from Pedal Ready doing Bikeability with some school kids. It was lovely being recognized, but bugger, I'd forgotten my helmet. I've now taken it off my strategically placed peg in the kitchen and hung it on my handle bars.

A young doctor friend called round that evening, shall we say he has a nice bedside manner!! (I'm sooo rude sometimes ;) )

Awwww, I am happy. I mean I understand that folk are paid to be nice to me, but I do appreciate that the folk I have come into contact with do sooooo much more than money could ever pay for. I'm going all dewy eyed now.


Apparently a guy from the CTC wants to see me, it's got something to do with a letter I wrote a couple of months ago and I got rebuffed (is that a word?) But how can I bear a grudge, when they pay the man who has saved my life!! (Anyway I think the CTC may read this now :)

Got to Hillsborough about 10.15am, and it was very crowded in the lodge, but mostly with staff. It was a swarm of green plastic vests. I spotted Miriam, the usual Pedal Ready staff, and lovely Fred. Then I saw Steve with a couple of folk who'd come to see what happens. Oooooh my head was all of a spin, I was spoilt for choice, all these folk I could talk too. Then Nigel walked in, he wouldn't have a go though :( But Miriam said she was honestly contemplating riding a bike to work, and would see how she got on. Awww, Dave from Pedal Ready would have made it complete though.

I felt like Miriam and Nigel didn't really experience me being a champion, but Steve pointed out that Miriam was only considering biking it to work because of today. And there was A* who'd left details with Miriam about also becoming a health champion.

I'm becoming such an anorak it's scary!! And I had an interesting chat at the end with a guy who's really interested in working with dysfunctional teenagers, and getting them more into bikes. Now I know I don't seem a likely person to assist with this, but I have a couple of ideas, and I did used to work for the youth service. And hey, my brains only 21!!!!!!

Awwww but the end came all too soon. I really enjoyed cycling today.

My heads spinning a little bit today because I'm just impatient, and I want a new bike. I am eternally grateful to my Mum and Dad, because I know they made big sacrifices for me. But I have always had second hand bikes, which were good enough, and because of them I learnt to ride at an early age. And I'm not like a lot of my friends who are in their forties and never learnt to ride a bicycle.

Steve says he will take me to West Country Recumbents, which is actually in Derby, to find my dream bike.

I cycled to school today, at 3, and my ex' girlfriend passed me as Gretel was making horrendous noises, I think her chain must have shifted. Thankfully my friend had gone when I fell 'tits up' - remind me to never try and get off backwards on a downhill slope.

OOooooh nearly forgot, how could I? Mmmm I had 4 strapping young men come into my fruitful garden, and snip my bush this morning. ;)

I woke up this morning, at 2am, feeling so giddy and excited. This was how I remembered feeling on Xmas Eve, aged 10!!! But it was the day when Steve Marsden (CTC), along with Emma and Chris (from disability linked social services departments), were taking me to London to check out recumbent bikes.

My journey began at 9am, and it was pouring it down. The windscreen constantly steamed up, making it impossible to see too well, poor Steve :( It took about 3hrs to get to London, and 2hrs to get through, well done to the backseat drivers :)

If I'm honest, I was a little disappointed in the guys that were running the shop, I have been so used to meeting really positive folk in the cycling world - with their shelters full of bikes and spares, having a fag and a cuppa tea, they reminded me of Steptoe and Son!!!!!

I zoomed off on the first one I tried which, unfortunately, was a little tricky to get in and out of. I can see me going 'tits up'!! And there was no real uphill gradient for me to try. But what there was, I managed fine. It didn't fold either.

The second one I tried, which was much sexier, I thought, did fold to go in the boot of a car. But it was very heavy to lift and ride. But it had room for shopping etc.

I want to bring one home to actually try, on the school runs. I can't believe I said that because 5 months ago, I wouldn't have dared! Thank you again Steve, I love you :D xxxxxx

Wow, what a difference a day makes!! I was feeling quite negative yesterday, my legs ached and I thought is it worth it? And I thought today, after a few positive comments: Yes it is!! Because it's not so much the effect my cycling has on me, it's how many folk it has a positive effect on.

Today, I went to a meeting first thing at HIRC, and I put on a very good example of the correct way to interview a fellow survivor of brain injury. So I felt good. I rushed back in the taxi, and as per usual the taxi driver was a little over friendly. But I know they must do it with 20 women a day, and if one says yeah they've scored!

Steve (CTC) phoned about tomorrow when he's taking me and some other folk to London Recumbents. I'm unbearably excited, how does the poor guy put up with me. Nigel (Health Champions), poor guy, is only just beginning to get a glimpse of my enthusiasm. Help, I'm wearing myself out with giddyness.

I don't wheeze, I pant....well just take lots of breaths, I don't actually stick my tongue out. It doesn't sound very attractive does it

Anyway today on the way to school, I passed this little old dear who spurs me on everyday. She got all maudlin, as she remembered her cycling days. I'd love to let her have a go on Gretel but wouldn't dream of it, in case she fell and broke a fragile bone. And she confessed to being 91!!!!

School was full of the usual mums. You know my children, they just come and tell me which way they're going home, and zooooooom they're gone.

My kids need so much stuff for tomorrow, it's mad. D* doing a show in front of the class, which she told me about 30 mins ago. And F* has got Beavers, bless.

I do love my life:)

Hey I woke up this morning, and remembered that last night was ...:D (I can't believe I'm saying this..... ) - but it was a 'singles' night that usually I would die for. But I've become such a cycling anorak I would rather share intimate moments drooling over recumbent cycles than single men.

Which reminds me ....last night, Steve Marsden (CTC), sent me a message saying the local CTC were sending me a 'Pedaller', and I actually wondered if they were giving me a bike!! (or a gorgeous man was gonna arrive on my doorstep.) Neither, it's a magazine, full of glossy pictures for me to get excited over ;)

My leg felt a little better, so I nipped out to the shops and the library. I walked into the library and my friend said 'flippen eck, you look like a tomato' and aren't you sweating. Rather apt. Thank you for that observation.

I must have over done the uphills yesterday, because my calf is agony. So I have given myself the day off today, but it's just typical: school phoned asking me to go and fetch my boy because his sister had gone without him. And I couldn't bear the thought of hurrying up to school, so I said I'd take responsibility for him making his own way home. (Well, he is nearly 7, and he goes on his own sometimes.) But those feelings of being incapacitated, and totally helpless. For a fleeting moment, I wished I'd still got my mobility scooter.

Met my new welfare worker today, and gotta say, he was fantastic! Such a positive person, who did 'Wheels For All' in June, with Nick. So it's nice to have someone who recognises what I'm blithering on about!

I'm doing a list of all the things that my new bike must be able to do, because I know I'll be excited and may forget.

Oh and I learnt yesterday, that the next Cycle For Health course will be held at Greenhill Park, which isn't too far. So I may be able to cycle, but the hill is about 1:5. So maybe not.

Falling off my tricycle earlier this week so reminded me of a time I fell off my mobility scooter.

A driver on seeing me screeched to a halt!! 'Don't worry love!!' he yelled, and proceeded to pick me up (not an easy task), all the time I was saying 'I can do it.'

Anyway, he put his arms round my breasts! and leaned me back on his big belly, and kinda walked my legs over to the scooter (a bit like when a child stands on a grown up's feet). I ended up pretending I really couldn't walk, and did truly need his assistance, as opposed to seeing him mortally embarrassed at the truth. At least I was able to be honest on Tuesday when I fell off the tricycle.


Today has been brilliant again, I do enjoy Cycle For Health, for totally selfish reasons as well. But if it encourages others, that's a double bonus!!

The lovely Fred was there, being as positive as ever, and I know Dave took some horrible photos of me today struggling up the hill. I know he will put them on here.

Do you know, I'm scared in case I miss someone, and I offend them :) But Amanda and I did have a right laugh about the mobility scooter incident when I told her today!!

I learnt that I am now able to meet J*, to assist her and another trainer on the disability bikes. I work well with J*, so I'm glad to feel useful.

:( I was hoping to buy my bike on Tuesday, when I go to London Recumbents, but my ex says I've got to wait. I hope they can deliver it soon.