I am Aunty Mable!!

Is anyone familiar with Aunty Mable, and her dog Pippins? It's a kids programme and my children loved it. Anyway she's an 'ordinary' (like everyone has an aircraft in their back garden) woman. Anyway, it's all about the ordinary but yet really interesting folk she meets on her fairly local adventurous travels. It's like I take Ziggy for a ride, and my adventures begin. I called at Tesco first and picked up a pot of portable porridge in case Dezza 4gets tomorrow, when he arrives with Kev, and Wendy.

I was on the main Road, when this cyclist asked me to 'pull' in. So I knew, that s'thing was up, or I knew him, bearing in mind that a few folk know me!! I 'pulled' in. Now do you recall about a week ago, I got into a greasy mess oooh er, with a man who lives round the corner? It was him. We agreed that this was not the place to be standing talking about geeky things. And went for a coffee. I can't say too much in case he reads, but the guy is so into riding light!! (do you get the pic) ..........enough said!!

He was explaining, how he used to live in London, was banned from driving......urm medically, now I didn't want to pry (me? as if) 'In case I kill s'one with the car' But all seems to be ok, when he can just cycle away, with his extra light everything, and pitch a tent. He said how he'd met (cough cough) the guy I'd my first intimate relationship with. (well, he doesn't know that!) who' also had some kind of break down. And he too had turned to cycling. Now all 3 of us, had gone to the best school in Sheffield, and had afluent upbringings (them more so). We'd all 'failed' to conform. And we were better people for it.

I've invited him round when my cyclist friends are here. Which reminds me...could you phone please Kev? ta

Btw, in case big bruvs reading to catch up; Mums delightful. x

Glad Rags

I've cycled, just enough, bought some glad rags 4 a party that's happening tonight. I must leave the party at 1130, hey am I Cinderella? come home because DH is calling in on his travels. It's nice to have choices, and feel wanted :) Catch you later. xxxx

I'm back at 12.25am, My taxi wasn't a pumpkin either. I am perfectly sober, I resisted temptation, to take advantage of folk been sooo generous. I was too mindful of being on my own in the house. Which is a dreadful thing to admit, because it means I'm quite likely to take risks when an 11 and a 7 year old are in!!

I felt very sorry for Yvonne who's party it was, there was no one there, only family. And a couple of us, who stand diligently at the bottom of the school drive everyday.

DH is calling in the morning instead :) I might make him some breky but non of that fleshy stuff. I've got f* hic ups now!!!

Night, xxxxxx luv you all.

here goes :(

Folk who've been reading now and again, for a while, know that I aint backwards at coming forwards. Nor do I hide my true feelings, infact I bet your all thinking, 'she's off again'. I am feeling lonely, left on the shelf, fat, and ugly today. I know that cycling would cure me, but I'm so low, I can't make myself do it. (again)

Oh and my ex hubby and ex bezzy mate, are in Sicilly getting married as I write. I don't think I give a toss, I certainly wouldn't swap my life back to how it was. But it kinda magnifys the fact that I'm on my own.

I am Fat

I'm just back from Julie Andrews, she's cooked a huge tuna pasta!! and I had seconds:)

Steve M phoned this morning, I know he is dying to meet another hero I have, Kev . So is bringing his children to Millhouses Park, on the 1st. I told him if i would write it on my blog, because then he knows there is no going back. I spoke to a few folk about various ideas, I had around cycling. But I have to admit :( I didn't take my own advice, stayed in being a miserable b*

I must cycle a wee bit tomorrow, to cheer me up.

Hey, I heard back today from Janet and Roger, about the Cycle Show in October. I'm so excited, they are really doing their upmost to take the stresses, out of cycling in London. I'm planning to stay Saturday and Sunday night.

What day are you going Dave?

Hey, did I mention, I think my SDS budget is gonna be slashed? I spoke with my SW today, who was saying things like, 'Well you get mobility allowance for taxis' but my mobility allowance pays the mortgage!!!

I'll find out Friday! Shit thats tomorrow!!!!!!!! :) I've also invited my SW to try the Inclusive Cycles, at Hillsbro when my collegues from the SDS team try em on the 2nd. I might be using a stinger gun as she cycles past!!!

It's all my fault :)

I am my own worst enemy! Aren't I? I sulk and moan, and blame folk, when really I only need to reread my diary entries, to know that No cycling leads me into a depressed melancholic Morrisey type of mood. And when I get off my arse a ride to my Mums and back about 6 miles. I feel fab, and re energised.

I did smile, I don't know whether to say this in case I offend,I am talking about ME here, and no one else. I was waiting at a give way sign, I had to give way to traffic on the main road. This big hgv came thundering along, and the workies in it, leaned out and whistled at me!! I felt like saying 'Ey you wouldn't have done that if you'd av known, I was a cripple' :D

Have I lost half my readers now?

I just seem to slowly rotate the pedals in a very methodical way. It isn't very fast, and I do pull in at Dore Station to let the queue of traffic pass and get home.

Thanks Dave for phoning, when my texts are me in a crisis!

I had a chat with an 'important' woman who works for the PCT, I have helped her out a lot in the past. We discussed a lot of the ideas that Dave and Kev and Nigel, have been coming up with, to get me off my arse and 'buddying' folk to cycle. She said they are strictly not allowed to start any new projects, and have got to wind down the ones that are in existence. But she did think Nigel's idea of setting up a charity, and offering a voluntary service, within that had legs/wheels!!!

You can tell I'm buzzin again.

Sorry :(

It pains me to admit it, but I am a bit crap really, I declined the offer of going for accreditation, for my ICDH, because I can't motivate!-myself. I wrote to about 5 folk about becoming an assistant cycle trainer, with the disabled. And after being passed over, onto the next one everytime. I give in, they all have my details. And finally, I can't cycle very far.

I think I'm gonna turn up for inclusive cycling on the 2nd of Sept, when my ex collegues are going, I know I'm miserable.

I love my trike :)

I do always get into a bit of a state going to visit my Mum, on my trike. But I don't know why, because I can do it very easily now. (providing I cheat at the traffic lights) Today I needed to call at the shop on the way for a few perishables, I parked up in the car park, and secured Ziggy to a barrier in the disabled parking space, I came out to find a guy taking a photo of her???? I nearly said, who are you the Parking Police?? Instead I enquired if I could help? anyway he was a lovely guy whose son, built recumbent trikes. I gave him one of my cards, and had a geeky chat with him whilst rubbing the tops of my thighs (not really)

Visiting Mum was good too I gave Adam, the Staff Nurse one of my cards and invited him to take Ziggy out. The way I see it, it might mean my Mum gets some extra attention. And hey I've got another very nice nurse friend. And although I promise to be good, that 21 year old inside might just get me damaged again :)

I seem to have spent all day, trying to hook Dave and Kev up!! Did you find each other??

Come back anyway, I miss you :( xx

Food :)

Hang overs do make me hungry :) Which won't come as any suprise to many of you. I kind of gave myself permission, to go a bit Over The Top, yesterday. I keep expecting to be overwhelmed with grief at my ex getting married to someone I knew, so well. And he only knew because of me and the children, and it doesn't bother me, I don't think. I did get a tinsy bit upset last night whilst slurring into a bottle of wine. When remembering the early days, of him going and how helpless I felt. But look at me now!! and I wouldn't be this person, if everything had come easily, if keeping my children, had been a for gone conclusion. If cycling, and getting a trike had been easy. (:D that's quite ironic, how I obtained it) I wouldn't have been so bothered about promoting disability cycling.

If I'd have found life easy on 'Direct Payments' the old form of buying services in through the Social Services. I wouldn't have been been first to be switched to Self Directed Support , where I seem to have found myself, carving out a little 'niche'. Which I love.

So on reflection, I feel a strong person, it's lifes tapestry of events that have created me. Anyway I digress, I always meander, I didn't cycle my 6miles round trip to my Mums, as intended. I was hungry, so ordered a gorgeous curry, instead of delivery though. I did collect it :)

I'm sorry to Dave or Kev, if I left you any strange messages via text/email/moby last night.

And I most definatetly don't follow Dave ?????????? Or Kev actually, soaps?

'I was happy in the haze of a drunkern hour' (x24)

Sang a lyrical genius.



I spent all day at BIRRP - well 3 hrs. Putting finishing touches to the 'discharge' (horrible word) process, for patients leaving the Head Injuries Rehab Centre.



My children have just gone to Sicily to see their dad marry my ex bezzy mate????? And I'm gonna miss them sooooooo much. And I have been so? well, ok about it to be honest. I mean them getting wed, I will miss the kids, but it will be so exciting for them.

As a send off, kinda thing (any excuse) we're off to the Spit, my local. And it's the first time I've ever got drunk and cycled, home on my trike. Which I'm not advocating, but I must say it's much easier and safer than trying to walk! That is once I'm actually sitting in my trike, it was a bit scary doing that. I cried a lot when Jock arrived to collect the children, because they were I think. Also My lil girl had written me a beautiful letter, which I was told not to open until they'd gone :(

Anyway, once home, I fell asleep in my office chair, writing this. Which I have just reteived and redone, all kinda sensible now. Didn't wake up until 3am, and staggered to bed.

What have I said?

Can someone please clear my conscience, because I honestly aint a Nazi, Bigot, or Tory promoter. I lead a simple life :) I have a very happy easy going way. (which I'm sure you've read about ;) )



Kevs opted (for admirable reasons) out of my, I mean Dave's fab idea, leaving me to invite Cleggy on my own, for a ride, I mean cycle ;) I got buckets of support for the idea from the SDS team, because I suppose it makes SDS look fab, and the sooner that is realised, the more 'freedom' for the disabled. To do 'normal' things, and take risks, as apposed to being wrapped up in cotton wool. Whilst meeting, I can just mention, that my ex hubby drove off in my VAT exempt car, which had lead to my sedately life style. But having st rived for health and Independence I was clobbered with a VAT bill of £1500, for choosing to use my own power and cycle. (not forgetting the other benefits)



I also heard from Mai, the lovely boss woman on the ICDH course, whose back tracking all my blog since last January, (it's scary, I know!) and setting me about 15 questions, to prove, I've learnt stuff. I quickly back tracked some stuff, and oops. It's all talk of Up and Under Brigade as DH calls FBs! and the lovely time I shared with Mr Potts.

Hey, do you know what I've done tonight, ready for my children being brought home? I've written my ex and Nicky a Thank you card, and it's decorated in cycle sprockets :D I know I'm nerdy, but hey?

I hope I've not upset you Kev, you are still my hero.

One Step nearer

But first, don't ask!!!! Congratulations to the Hunslet Rugby Club. (that was for Paul)

Back to business, a friend of a friend gave me Nick Cleggs secretary (Maggie) ey bezzy mates me and Mags :) telephone number. So I will phone tomorrow, although she suspected it would be too late, and they would already be comitted for the 9 +10th of October, and not able to join Kev and I for(note the word for, and not the number ;)!!!!) a cycle ride at the Cycle Show.

Hey, I've got a pretty fab opportunity maybe to do the Leicester Sky Ride!! I've got a kinda FB from there whose recently been in touch, and wanting to resume things maybe??? What was the name you called me earlier???

Oh f* B* W*!!!!! I was non too happy, about my ICDH course, which I completed earlier this year. Apparently I can have a level 3!! which is university level, and what I would need if I wanted to do my Cert Ed!!! If I rewrite my blog pages, because whilst they're are gushy and down to the bare bones, type of stuff, they don't often answer, the set question :D (no suprises there then!)

Delussions of Grandier :D

I don't care really, I know I think big, (and am big -size) But hey, folk seem to like me doing that, probably in a condescending way :D But today I eccelled !! It was Dave's idea, honest. I emailed my contact at the council, telling her I would be at the Cycle Show this October the 9+10th, (maybe) www.cycleshow.co.uk/ - Cached - Similar with Wheels for Wellbeing, www.wheelsforwellbeing.org.uk. And that my local MP is Nick Clegg, and that Kev Hickmans MP is David Cameron, and we'd really like it if they could join us for a ride on our bikes/trikes. This way they could see how a reduction in my support costs, of £11,000 can be made. And me maintain a happy very active, healthy life with my 2 young children. As a single Mum. And by cycling to Earls court, with us they would score brownie points, for a) being disabled friendly b) Supporting SDS (which was brought in by their predecessors :) ) c) Supporting a green way to travel d) Sheffields SDS, would look good. e) And finally what a positive boost it would give to disabled folk, who hadn't dreamt, that one day they might have the capabilities, to actually cycle!!

Anyway, I aint heard back from anyone on that little outrageous suggestion of DH. (I just blame him!!)

I spoke to Rob last night with his Di bassi trike, and as I thought, he is looking forward to meeting everyone and showing his trike off, at the end of the month.

Hey, if folk want to we can go cycling in the woods actually?? I don't do it on my own.

I've had to check my computer inbox it's been extraodinarily quiet?

Love you all, I'm in a really good mood, and I haven't even been on my trike!!

Free Medicine

I had a blast of my free medicine today, and went to visit my Mum. And do you know, I'm always put off by the journey, and I don't know why, because it always gives me such a buzz. And my Mum was delightful. It was totally without drama, apart from this incredibly 'helpful' woman, who leaned right out of the window and shouted. 'Your jacket at the back' now I was 99% sure that's what she said, in reference to Steve's fluorescent one that he'd strapped to my panniers. But I had to pull in and check, just in case!! To the friendly honk of a school Mum/drinking pal.

My ex brought my children home, and they were full of excitment about the forth coming wedding (his). And I just said wow, I bet you look fab, and made all the right noises. I reckon I've been in love twice in my life, and it has always been so important to my ex' that I've forgiven them for being shit :D I think I will give my ex, and my old bezzy mate a wedding card. Cor...I must be in a good mood!!

I am hot in demand again by the council, wanting to know my availability.

Kev phoned from ICF http://inclusivecyclingforum.org.uk/forum/rides-meets/norwich-meet/#p101 to say him and Nobby will accept my invitation, which reminds me I must phone Rob Wright, I did send him an email, but???

I'm in a right good mood. xxx

Passion waggon

Hey, I think I used Ziggy, quite successfully to 'pull' tonight :) OOoooooooooooh we got covered in grime as we took my back wheel off, so we could put a chunkier tyre on. But unfortunately the replacement tyre I'd got was too big!! ooops!! And to be honest, it looked too chunky anyway, it wasn't what I had in mind. So after a couple of hours of me sweating and pumping (the tyres!!) Which were so flat incidently, theres no wonder I was finding it difficult to ride. We swapped numbers, but I doulbt he'll phone me as he's one of these techno phobes who knows how to basically cycle and mend a bike but doesn't know didly about using a moby.

I heard from Kev, shall I mark off the 30th to the 1st? Is anyone else coming? say so, if you are? I'm gonna block those days off, in my social diary anyhow now. xx

Steve (CTC) told Gillian from York to speak with me, about getting a tricycle instead of a mobility scooter. And the difference it has made to me?

'The Bible'

I believe I was just in time to get the inclusive cycling at Hillsbro', a place in 'The Bible' of services for the disabled. 'Help Youself' is an annual publication which lists the services available within Sheffield. And I think Hillsborough Cycling has earnt it's place. It's all about who you know though, because if I hadn't have been at that 'High Brow' meeting on Tuesday. Saving folks skin, I wouldn't have heard about it. And my enthusiasm for the cycling that takes place. Earnt it an automatic acceptance (in principle!!) So I feel quite pleased.

Steve phoned this morning, for an hour!!

I've cemented a date with my collegues from SDS, at Hillsborough with Steve, Ed and myself. It's nice to know he still advises folk to talk to me....?

I do love cycling, it has changed me so much. I no longer want to live in the city. I'd like to live somewhere thats more cycle friendly. With some nice off road cycle paths, I sound reclusive, and anoraky. I'm not myself :)

Such Kudos

2days ago, I was asked to fill a large gap of 15mins, during a presentation about SDS. To the councils higher arkey. Now I did question if they wanted me to perform with a brightly coloured ball? Because I know they rely on me to lighten the mood, whether that be entirely intentional or not, is not clear.?

I used the lime light to expose how a bottle of wine, and a £10 tesco voucher, provided me with child care, which enabled me to assist in the delivery of training and presentations. And a coffee and a bun, paid for a lift back from cycling in the early days. Which cemented my future with Inclusive Cycling, which led me to become a Health Champion, then my ICDH which has led to this and will lead to more hopefully.

I was rushed out of that meeting, to go to another in the next building. As I sat down with a drink, Jeanette burst in with flowers. To thank me for the first presentation, awww how nice. This meeting, I think was the 'Project Initiation Document'??? Which released funds, so stratergies and projects got the yeah or neigh. It was a bit over my head, but sometimes I do like stating the very obvious at such high brow meets. Anyway I was asked to be part of it, I asked to be kept in the loop, because I think it may depend on what was being discussed.

I did enjoy myself today :)

Ahhh I did love my time wi SDS

Contrary to what your trying to work out, SDS isn't some sort of nawty disease!! It stands for Self Directed Support, or Individual Budgeting, which is fab! It's changed my life, whether that be because my budget does allow, for failings, like my computer breaking down, or my cleaner (he's so much more!) been off sick, and my mates stepping in with payment in vouchers. Or ohhh my bushes trimming ;) in exchange for a take away. A really good one happened last Xmas, when my trike was being repaired at Recycle at Meersbrook, and I bought a friend, tea at The Spit got him, Iand not me, a bit tipsy he cycled Ziggy, from Recycle to the pub, and back to my house, made sure everything was secured, and posted the keys through the letter box. All for £12. ........BARGAIN Today my budget was worked out at £16116, Not bad considering I only get £4500.

I didnt get chance to go for a ride, but I am happy, I've met some very funny folk today. So Hi if you were one of them, :) I really enjoyed meeting you.

CAKE :Dxx

withdrawal symptoms

I can really tell I aint been cycling today, and not had that natural happy drug. Urrrrrgh it doesn't take too much either. It's just really difficult when I've got the children at home. I wonder if I'll be able to sneak in a ride before work tomorrow, hey it's my last day with the SDS team. :(

No one phoned today to explain why no one had told me about Hillsbro' closiong for the summer.

After my ride back from Millhouses Park yesterday, I'm toying with the idea of arranging a ride, not exclusively for the disabled, but it would be disabled friendly. If it was in the park, because it's flat. What do folk think??? and the cafe is nice, (get priorities right) I'm not sure if we'd be allowed, I'd need to speak with the Park Rangers.

Am I the only one who goes all gushy, and soppy? No not physically!! I mean talks about feelings, and lifes ups and downs? or is it only me who feels so bi polar. Or is it infact folk just don't talk about themselves as much as I do :D I'm really sorry if it's the latter.

The one sure thing I was suggesting Millhouses for, doesn't want to do it. So while I feel very unpopular and very inimportant. I feel a bit pleased, because I pursueded him, 8 months ago to buy his first tricycle. Which he did, and cycles twice a week with his bruv. In a park, where I attended CFH once a week, but it was only half a KM round the perimeter.

I hope to leave my kids eating breakfast whilst I nip out for 10 mins in the morning, I need waking up before work.

8 miles!!!

I don't know why I chose today to do it, with bulging poorly tum, socks on that make my feet feel 90'' my entire body feels like it's 90''! And I'm at a kinda loss really about my future, and cycling???? :)

I am happy though having done it because my wee boy was thrilled to bits, because we stopped off at the 'Bike Tree' on the way, and my reception had been much more welcoming. When I payed, the guy asked me if I knew Steve Marsden, and introduced himself as Ash. Who Steve had told me worked there. He said, Wow can I have a look at your recumbent? So he had a shot on Ziggy, and I arranged for Ash, to become Ziggy's trike mechanic. We sped off to the monkey bumps first, but the path was too narrow for Ziggy, and F* didnt fancy going too far into the dark woods om his own. So a plan was hatched - by F* I might add!! 'Lets go to the skate park' which was about a mile further. And I know all you strapping men, are thinkin, its nowt. But that's an extra 2 miles!! We said 'Hello' to my Mum. And then, we made our way to the skate park.

I felt a bit sorry for my wee boy because he was the only young person on the park, who was wearing a helmet. And he did ask me if he had to wear it???? I said 'Do you want to be like me?' That scared him I think, (he'd probably got images of sprouting breasts, and losing his 'todge' :D)

We cycled back calling in at the bike tree again, where I begged for a high calories energy bar. They gave me a kinda fruity thing that I imagine makes 'one' 'poo' a lot. I might let you know :)

Ey! The Fat Lady Sings

I cried today :( Cycled to the nicer curry house, came home ate drank (wine). And hey here I am. Perhaps only trickles to begin with...oooooh so rude :)

I hate to disappoint :(

Look, I'm not gonna do anymore, I know I'm being a drama queen. But I've done what I set out to do, I pick my wee boy up from school. I can cycle to see my Mum. I've got the dogs bollox of a trike (well I think so) I've met loads of interesting folk, I've been to York CTC, Centre Parks. I'm not wanted at Hillsborough.

I do like my blog, but what will I talk about?

SDS, Kev and Bridgit

Urrrr that was Yesterday, hey I'm tired!! Speak later.

Dr Dave? :D

As you seem to know a bit about sexy support socks??? Will I have to have my legs bound ever so tightly in this heat....again? I've just got a replacement pair, and I have got them on, with a lot of effort, (I paint a very attractive image) or will they shrink back the more I wear the socks?

Aww I couldn't go to Tesco, and see my beloved Pat, the children were far too busy!!! Seeing their mates, going on bike rides etc. And I really don't like to be the party pooper.

I've just spoken wi Kev, and Im looking forward to dinner wi you and Bridgit tomorrow evening. Oh I 4got to mention, I am a vegetarian (so no where like 'Damons Kebab House') or owt. If I speak wi Rob before I'll see if he wants to come. If I could trust him/me to be sensible, I'd invite Pete, the DL guy. Just because he's always got a story to tell.

Posties :)

Aww, it is part of our heritage, isn't it, for Postmen/women to cycle around delivering the Royal Mail? Well at least, in rural spots?? Ignoring the positives, like health, (i bet there aren't as many sickies) and the enviroment, well it's just a nice sight, I wish we could still see little children cycling back with their daily Hovis :) Anyway, if you aint done it already? let Royal Mail know just how much you'll miss the posties on cycles.
www.ctc.org.uk/royalmail

I 'bigged' myself up a bit, and sent Steve Bailey an invite to Thursdays meet. He declined very graciously, but his email was full of nice comments, and it was a long shot, as the meetings only in 3 days.

I spoke with Nigel West, kinda apologising for Steve Ms, absence, He too was really nice, saying it was me and the other folk that he wanted to see. To secure inclusive cyclings future.

Micky the gangster, came round, declining my offer of tea :( But trimin my bush ;)

Julie Andrews popped round, for a chat, declined the wine though. Shame.

Only cycled to the doctors to pick up my script for my attractive support socks, went to theshops and library. I love the freedom cycling gives me, why aren't I thin????

Diversability

Max Burt is right, in his comments that point to the fact that YES there are a group of 'disabled' individuals, who are as different, as 2 finger prints. The simularity between them lies in their love of cycling, to varying degrees of capabilities.

I'm really pleased, to have spoken with Kev tonight. And I'm glad Hillsborough, is still happening. I'll get phoning folk tomorrow :) I'm so glad that although my disabilities very different from his. We've got the awareness to empathise with one another.